By Julia Berkman
Virginity is as mystical and legendary in American culture as cowboys or Bigfoot. What is it? Do you have it? Have you lost it? An event championed by the Queer Resource Center had, in the past, delved into the scary, shocking or banal event of Losing It. Unfortunately, in recent years the QRC hasn’t been putting on their Losing Virginity event. Two fairhaven students, Rylee Young and Anlya Folsom, have instead taken on the mantle of championing their own spinoff event for their senior project. Losing Virginity is taking place in the Fairhaven Auditorium on March 7 at 7 p.m.
For the well-informed these days, virginity is agreed upon to be a social construct. Yet, we as a culture are still interested in the process of your own “sexual debut” (a term championed by Western’s Human Sexuality professor James Graham).
Without getting into the mechanics of things, it’s generally hard for people to figure out what their “first time” was. This becomes an even trickier question for people in the LGBTQ community. Virginity is a cis-heteronormative concept, which means it only considers intercourse between a cisgender man and a cisgender woman to be the true definition of sex. In actuality, sex comes in many forms, shapes and activities.
“I, personally, view virginity as a social construct that often does more harm than good in the lives of growing individuals, but I’m also interested to see some other views and opinions on the matter,” event organizer Rylee Young said.
Despite the prescriptive nature of virginity, it is still a very important idea in the minds of a lot of individuals. Even if you don’t agree with virginity as a social construct, your own sexual debut can still be an important milestone.
“We really want an opportunity for a variety of people to come together and talk about how the concept of virginity has impacted them, exploring the different ways it affects different people,“ event organizer Anyla Folsom said.
Virginity is often seen as something to get rid of, but for Young, who is asexual, the idea of having sex just so you can re-label yourself is the product of a damaging and hypersexual society.
“Being asexual, I always had a pretty strained relationship with the idea of virginity and the absolute societal need with losing your virginity,” Young said. “When people learn that you’re a virgin they usually think one of two things: You’re either religious and saving yourself for marriage, or you’re naïve and a prude.”
And yet, on the other side of the coin, a woman who begins her sexual debut far earlier is seen as someone with loose morals. The correct time frame to begin having sex is as arbitrary as the concept of virginity itself.
So basically, no matter if you lose it or keep it, virginity and sex are hovering over the heads of every college student. It makes sense then, that an event like this is necessary in our society.
Rylee had this to add: “In an environment like Western, social constructs hold a lot of weight on people’s lives and perspectives.” It makes total sense that art surrounding virginity is cathartic to make or witness.
The event will feature visual art pieces as well as live performances revolving around each individual’s perception of virginity. There’s also an opportunity for audience members to get up and share their own stories or art about virginity. The event is in the Fairhaven Auditorium March 7 at 7 p.m.
ABOVE: Featured image by Kylie Owen // AS Publicity Center