By Gwen Frost
I’m not really sure if I’m a good kisser, and I want to be able to not be boring and repetitive when I kiss someone, while also not just feeling like I’m sticking my tongue down someone’s throat. I don’t always know how to initiate a kiss either, or what to do with my hands or if I should make noise or anything. I’m only 18 and I’ve kissed a few people, but I don’t know if I’ve fully gotten the hang of it. What are some tips?
– Tips on Tongue
Dear Tips on Tongue,
The Art of Kissing is very important and I am glad you are taking it seriously! There is no “right” way to kiss- it depends on who, where, when, and many other factors. However, I definitely have some tips that I believe to be foolproof Good Kisser traits.
Tip 1: When you are with someone that you would like to kiss, it is a good idea to make eye contact. Eye contact is an important aspect of the roleplay leading up to a good kiss. It is an insult to dedicated kissers everywhere to call “kissing” itself foreplay- kiss for the sake of kissing, not whatever might happen next.
Eye contact is an excellent way to connect. Sophomore Sophia Marble said, “let them know I want to be to kissing you, not just kissing.” However, do not keep your eyes open while you are kissing! I promise you that you will both shut your eyes very fast if you wind up making eye contact while your lips are touching. “I think you need to close off all your sense and focus on the feel,” said Sophomore Mark Hussin.
Tip 2: Tongue is definitely an important aspect for a kiss longer than 3 to 4 seconds, but many people can relate to the experience of feeling like someone’s licking their molars. It’s uncomfortable. Unless you feel a rush of passion or it’s happening mutually, maybe don’t advance your tongue further than like a third-way into someone’s mouth. This might be a personal preference, but I think tongue is kind of like sugar in coffee. You can always add more, but you can’t really un-lick someone’s tonsils. “You know what’s the worst? when someone uses an excess amount of tongue and their mouth is just really open,” said Junior Quin McKinney
Tip 3: Don’t rush through it! Kissing in itself isn’t just a segue into something else, so take your time. Let your mind get fuzzy and your cheeks pink, don’t get preoccupied with what might happen next.
Tip 4: If you don’t know what to do with your hands, holding the other’s head in a cradling fashion or pulling them in by touching their lower back is a good call. Run your fingers through their coconut-conditioned hair, trace their spine, wrap your arms around their shoulders; kissing is not just about the lips.
Tip 5: There are lots of erogenous zones that are good to involve in a make-out sesh. The earlobes, neck, and collarbone are areas good for kissing and nibbling due to the centralization of nerve endings. “People either forget or underestimate the power of kissing someone’s hand or their cheek,” said Junior Adam Estrada. Though biting is generally enjoyable, just like tongue, it can be extremely overdone. You don’t want somebody to be scared of losing a lip or a limb. Nibble, don’t chomp.